Songwriting/Band vs DJing/Producing

Those who know me know that about %70 of my musical tastes are of that of electronic dance music. I got into it as a Freshman in college after attending a massive “rave” at the Gov nightclub in Toronto. I’ll never forget it; a sight completely foreign to me. Flashing lights and booming, hypnotic music expressed through enormous sound systems. The place was completely packed, all 5 rooms - one which through a strange sequence of events I got to do lighting for an hour or so. As an 18 year old, I was hooked. I’ve been a fan ever since and about two years ago started DJing casually. It was never anything I took too seriously, but rather I did it for enjoyment. It was something so completely different from what I was doing with my own music at the time - and I suppose it offered a break from that. I have a tendency to get really stressed over my art and DJing allows me an escape of some sorts.


Anyhow, I’ve been getting more DJing gigs lately and have started producing here and there. Again, I do it all for simple fun - but it’s a lot of fun. And I’ve honestly asked myself which one do I prefer. It’s a simple answer and I’d like to articulate why.

You can take drugs, jump out of an airplane, have the best sex of your life, but NOTHING compares to a performance high. It’s short and fleeting and addictive, but during that time there is no future, no past… only the present moment; a moment that no problems in the world lie. Now, performing with my band AND DJing can produce this high, but here’s the difference. When performing my own songs, there is a different high.

Once it hits, there is no audience, there is no band, no lights, no sound. And in that moment, there is only you and pure, raw emotion. It wells up from your core and spread through your limbs. And I believe that in this state is when the true, unadulterated self is expressed. This is what it means to be human.



Again, both mediums can produce this high, but the flurry of honest emotion that coincides with band performance, while harder to achieve, is significantly better - that is, at least for me.

I saw my friend GRiZ perform last night at the two year anniversary of Cirque Du Womp, a huge bass music (dubstep, drum and bass, glitch hop) event that took place in Detroit. He is an extremely talented and original producer who has recently hit it big (he’s touring as direct support for Big Gigantic next month). It took me a bit to get into his tunes (mainly because I’m not a huge bass music fan, although I do enjoy it in doses), but apart from stellar production and thick grooves, his stuff has a soulful tinge that eventually reeled me in.

I couldn’t help thinking - as he played for 2000 absolutely ecstatic rave kids - does he, or any other of my favorite electronic producers… do they get to feel what I do? Here I am, playing for crowds a tenth of the size; in some cases quietly to a good friend, or best yet, a bedroom wall - each offering an opportunity to “lose it” as I like to say. I know it’s lame, but I’ve come close to crying while playing, always just after “losing it”. I fucking wept after our CD release show in Lansing because I was so happy. Maybe it’s just me, but I hope that in some way, my favorite electronic producers, or all musicians for that matter, get to feel as I do in some way or another. I also take great pleasure playing with my backing band, who I personally regard as some of the most awesome musicians/people in the world. At times, I particularly just like watching them jam with each other. Grooving with people who really know how play is a blessing in itself.



This is why I play music and will continue to play music even if everyone stopped listening. And for that, whether or not I actually do something “big” with my tunes (I hate using that word, by the way), I will always be grateful that I have this creative ability. While they are awesome to have, it is not about the audience, recognition, or money (and don’t get me wrong, I find myself getting caught up in the politics of music all the time), but rather about being a god damn human being and making honest, genuine art. So for you, dear reader, regardless of what medium you choose to express yourself, do it with integrity and intensity, and most importantly, do it for yourself; make it mean something to you.